Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Candidates for Texas Head Coaching Job

Just in case Mack Brown does indeed step down in the next 48 hours (and if you are not buying Saint Nick leaving T-Town), I've scoured the Interwebs for the next head coach of University of Texas Longhorns. Hard to pick just one...

Coach from Old Spice Commercial

Nobody Wants to Hear That Story Again

Although he is aged well beyond what we've come to expect out of a "new" head football coach, I suspect the press conferences will go very well when he begins by drawing, yet again, on the white board what exactly went down on that mild summer night outside of White Lake, New York in 1969.

Coach from Aflac Commercial

He's Gonna Help Us Turn This Thing Around in the Second Half

In the first 8 seconds, the coach admits he is not a real leader, and thus brings in a duck to help turn the team around for the second half. Of course, instead of the Aflac duck, he would have to bring in Bevo, who would say just as much (and bring as many "grown man tears") as the duck did.

Robin Williams from Snickers Commercial

Let's KILL THEM, with kindness.

It is not everyday you get a prospective coach who has played a cross-dressing nanny, president, alien, Peter Pan, psychopath, and physician in previous realms of life, but Robin Williams (as long as he is hungry) is the perfect coach to take over for such a prestigious football program.

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